“If you really loved people, you would give away your work for free.”
“Don’t you care about people who are unfortunate and don’t have money for your services?”
“Enlightened people don’t care about money.”
“Don’t you think it’s SELFISH to charge so much for your work?”
Money money money…
What a love hate relationship we have had.
For so many years of my life, I worked HARD for money. I SLAVED for pennies. Everyone knows people in social work don’t make much. And I wore that badge with pride. I was a GOOD person because GOOD people work HARD. GOOD people live in REALITY. GOOD people UNDERSTAND when they are asked to work hours they aren’t paid for. GOOD people don’t say “no” to a vulnerable clients. Even if they’ve already worked a 10 hour day. Even if they didn’t get a lunch OR dinner break. Even if it’s in the middle of the night.
GOOD people put their own needs on the back shelf because they are THAT LOVING.
This was the narrative I lived for a LARGE portion of my life. It’s still a voice I occasionally struggle with today.
Here’s why I choose to BURN IT TO THE GODDAMN GROUND:
- Sacrificing myself IS NOT LOVING TO ANYONE. It limits me. It harms me. It exhausts me. It puts me in REALLY sour moods. It CRIPPLES my ability to feel alive and thrive. It DISTRACTS ME from my life purpose and message.
- Trying to live up to the “good person” standard was an illusion of “love”. It wasn’t love at all. It was my own DISCOMFORT with other people’s choices, consequences, and pain. It was me THINKING I KNEW BETTER than they did - than the Divine did.
- Settling for less than my time was worth damaged me AND OTHERS. I placed myself in the role of their SAVIOR. I STOLE THE PAIN that was their divine gift, that was trying to point them to a greater level of self love.
- Believing others NEEDED ME TO HARM MYSELF was DISHONORING. By stepping in as rescuer, my actions were sending a clear message - YOU AREN’T CAPABLE so step aside and let me.
- I have watched MAGIC happen in my own life when others have NOT RESCUED ME. When they have NOT GIVEN ME DISCOUNTS. When they have NOT REDUCED their services and their time for FREE. Their ACTIONS tell me I don’t NEED TO BE RESCUED.
- I would never DREAM of going to the grocery store, filling up my cart, and asking the cashier if I could have the items for free. THAT WOULD BE RUDE AF. Why would I ever think it’s ok to let someone do that to me?
So, Goddess, STOP reducing yourself. STOP diminishing the value of your TIME. NO, it’s NOT loving.
YOU are entitled to your time, energy, effort, resources, and body FIRST. Everyone else gets to ask PERMISSION and VALUE your presence, with an EQUAL energy exchange.
It’s time to level up the standards, Goddess. Charge all the money. Stop giving yourself away for free.